What I Live For

~Creativity
~My LIFE

I took the day off for once because I am sick with a stomach virus and a cold that I must've caught from my 1st graders yesterday. Then my body was stressed from all this running around, must've weakened a bit.

The photo represents something wonderful in my life - this new relationship along with the creativity of Photoshop. (BTW, if you wish to read more about the romance in my life - click this ) It has a few smudges that I need to correct. Ever since Abee showed me these tricks, I am playing with digital photos like a child plays with a new toy.

I am going to update my little blogs soon, wish I could say today but don't know if that's happening - depends on how I feel etc. I've got a lot of ideas for poetry. No other way to express these emotions. But hey there are some poems on my poetry blog if no one has read 'em Poetry Blog

I completed the Fall semester of 2005 with a B average. That's okay for me; I am used to the A's. I learned a lot though and that's what matters. I didn't make an A on the Ana Castillo research paper like I hoped but my professor still said it was an excellent. I need to see her comments.

I've been working about 3-4 jobs for the past month. You see, I'm a full-time subsitute teacher, LEAD Ambassador (we haven't did much lately though), photographer (running my little business there), and a Fossil Represenative on the weekends. You know Fossil watches and belts and purses? Because of my sales experience, I am working as a rep inside Dillard's Dept. store - to be specific - watch department. It feels pretty good to be back in the retail atmosphere again. If no one knew, I used to work @ Dillard's for nearly three years. I know all about retail - the sales quota, the long hours, the demands. I love giving quality customer service though. I like the customers to leave all satisifed w/ their 11 year warranty and stylish watch. This weekend I begin the chaotic 7 days straight working. On Christmas Eve, I have another gig - a Quincenera. I have this beautiful red dress with a bolero to wear. Dang, I still need me some red shoes. I might just wear black. Tony is supposed to come and go with me. It will be nice to go to a baile with a man. He likes to dance - I hope we dance well together.

So much has happened in my life that I want to share. I gotta admit: teaching has fulfilled me. I've worked w/ so many different ages of kids. I have become attached to the 7th graders @ the middle school on the South Side. A lot of these kids are of lower socioeconmic status - they need to see a positive role model of their skin tone - they need to be told that "being there for your homeboys is not what life is all about." I'm talking about gangs. Nothing wrong with tight friendship. Something wrong w/ the fighting and the stabbing. The girls need to know that "having a boyfriend is not what life's all about." They ask me why I am not married, why I don't have kids, and their eyes light up with interest and curiosity when I say "I'm too young, I am enjoying life. Yes, I have a boyfriend, but I've waited awhile." They are interested to learn about college, shopping, working, driving, - all the things I do. They want to go riding in my Impala because it's "pimpin" and I like some of the same rap music. They wanted me to go see Frankie J with them. They tell me about their boyfriends and their moms being strict with them. Then, there's the ones who's parents don't care because they're "not there." It breaks my heart when a little boy tells me "My dad's in jail and this is Mama's 3rd boyfriend- she wants me to call him Dad but he's NOT my dad." Things like that bug me. I care about the kids so much.

Yesteday, I had 1st graders (two day assign. - I got attached) and I was getting frustrated because I felt myself getting sick and I was late picking them up from P.E. because I had to use the bathroom - stomach virus was kicking in. I had a head-ache and I was trying to calm them down. One of the little girls with big brown watery eyes and boogers falling on top of her lip, tugs on my hand "Ms. C, are you ok? You feel sick?" I handed her a Kleenex and said, "I am okay." I forced a smile. I started feeling sick all afternoon but kept the smile. My voice was growing weaker as I tried to teach them Math - not a Mathematician here. The office made an announcement to take all 1st graders to the gym to practice for the Christmas Play. We walked over - single file, hands behind back, no talking. My class was so well-behaved. We lined them up in their spots for the play. They kept their mouths closed until it was time to sing. As soon as they started to sing the Christmas carols, I felt my insides swell with pride "like a proud mama."
It was a great end to a long day. :)

If I do not blog before Christmas: wishing you all a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Let's remember what the hoidays are about: family, and Jesus' birth!