Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Closing Chapters, Holidays, and Bells
Last time I blogged I was really excited about my new classroom. It was great and such a wonderful learning experience ~ the whole month it lasted. The district had to hire a "certified" teacher. Since I barely began the process, I am not "qualified." The process has been stressful, but I have been studying and taking everything one day at a time. Honestly, I knew it was God's will when it happened. The principal wants to hire me in August though, so that's a great thing! I miss the kids a lot. They sang some songs to me and made me pretty cards. I was close to tears on my last day before the new teacher took over. The tears were also of joy because, the kids and I grew so close. I truly realized what a difference I made in their lives. They are wanting to invite me to their quinceaneras and saying how cool I am. It was tough to love every student the way God wants us to love His children, but I managed. I learned from them as much as they learned from me. Before I left, we had started this enjoyable short story collection, Local News by Gary Soto. Spanish words were flying through the air, and students were enjoying and relating to the stories. Those are some sweet memories.
The holidays are approaching. I am looking forward to the time off from school. I have a holiday job already lined up with Fossil. So this will be the "fifth" year I spend Christmas in retail, but it will be nice to be in customer service again. Not to mention, I will be working in the same city as Tony, so I will get to see him.
As for our relationship, it is wonderful. Lately, Tony has been telling me how he never gets bored with me, and I am amazed. Truly amazed to the point that I am speechless. Because I am such a unique individual! We've been going to church together, and Sunday, he actually visted my church and felt the message speak to us. Our spiritual connection is growing stronger every day. I pray that every couple can enjoy this type of bond as Christians - the way God wants us to love. I am not going to say our relationship is so smooth that we never fight. But, I can say that we never stop communicating, and there are times I close myself up and struggle, and try to struggle by myself, but he's always there reaching out for me. I give thanks to God every day for that. More and more each day, we realize which direction this relationship is heading. Every day, I talk to God, and I tell Him, how everything that has happened in my life is HIS plan, not mine. The joy and peace I have is infinite - as large as the galaxies of stars in the night sky. It's as bright as the morning rays that pour over me at daybreak. The direction we are going - ......................... marriage.
Of course, we have struggled to accept this. In my mind, I question if I am too young or if I have lived enough or what of finances? or what about grad school? But then I turn to my devotionals and scripture the way I do in these times of doubt, and God will comfort me. Statements will jump out at me like "two is better than one, because one will hold the other when one falls. Two will keep warm, pity on the one who is alone." That's scripture, Ephesians 4:9-12.
Then there are those moments with Tony, when all I have to do is look at him, and any troubles just melt away or he has an answer for my questions or he feels the same about something. We are alike; it's like looking in the mirror sometimes. One of my students used to tease me because I had pictures of us on my desk. He would say that my boyfriend looked my cousin, lol. I guess we have truly became part of each other that we're starting to resemble each other, lol.
He has not formallly proposed yet, but he said he's going to and it's going to be special. I am excited, but I also know how serious this is. Forever. Commitment. Sure, I think of the wedding festivities, and I do have my colors picked out (red, gold, and ivory,) and I have an idea of what my dress is going to look like. I also have a theme in mind, something of angels and gold stars. A biblical theme. Revelations. But...........
there is spiritual preparation. Mediation of Scripture. Reading books like "the Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. Bible study.Prayer. Drawing close to God. That's what matters more to me. Not all the decorations and dresses and festivities. But, the vows and the sincerity I will have when saying them. There are ways I will learn like praying the Rosary with Tony. Learning what is necessary for us to get married by the Catholic Church, because I was not raised Catholic.
We want to continue growing and there is the constant struggle between the world and God. We are willing to fight the "Good Fight," though. We know that we will not be a classic Romeo & Juliet tale, but live through this triumphantly.
I am excited about what is going to happen in my life, but at the same time, I must give it to God and allow him to guide us and provide His Divine Direction.
In closing, I hope I can blog again and keep all my readers and blogging buddies up to date. I wish everyone a Happy Holidays! Let us not forget that ~ JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!